Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoSo...what happened? Barack becomes president and suddenly there's no more need for Black History Month? What happened to the cheesy commercials, the ridiculously racist clearance sales, the pointless, tacky flash ads, the poorly executed exhibits and galleries...the oh-so-serious, made-for-TV BET movies?...
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Declared by Douglas on Tuesday, February 10, 2009
What the fuck is the deal! Why do you ignore me like I don't exist when I am sitting right fucking next to you? Why the fuck can't you listen even though it is your own fault that things are so fucked up for you! FUCK YOU, YOU SELF-CENTERED, SHIT-FOR-BRAINS, EGO-FUCKING BITCH!!!!
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Declared by Jee Had on Monday, February 9, 2009
Next time you make changes to our persistence layer, make sure you test your changes before you commit...otherwise I'll buy you a helmet to wear in the office!
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Declared by S.R.Garcia on Friday, February 6, 2009
I worked on a magnet application for four hours and when I pressed the submit button, guess what I got...A LOGIN SCREEN...I logged in...all that work was LOST!
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Declared by Sami Patel on Thursday, February 5, 2009
I am going to jihad you, Glenn. Why won't you accept my advances? I just want you for one last infidelity. PLEASE - homosexuality isn't a crime. It is a righteous passion, and we will not be judged for it.
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Declared by Woody on Thursday, February 5, 2009
I declare a JIHAD on you and your laziness as a result of which your Xbox 360 still sits broken at home. JIHAD!
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Declared by Your nemesis on Wednesday, February 4, 2009
I declare a JIHAD on you for sucking in HALO 3! All praise be to Viperx100 for bailing your ass out all of the time. Jihad!
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Jihad on you and your twin and your family. Infidel!
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, January 29, 2009
Go blow yourself, you ugly, white trash skank, and leave other girls' boyfriends alone.
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Your days are numbered. This is just the beginning!
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Declared by Daniel on Wednesday, January 28, 2009
All glory and praise to the brunettes, proven time and time again to be genetically superior.
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, January 25, 2009
Fuckers! You almost killed me by selling me soy milk that has passed the expiry date!
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Declared by Anon on Saturday, January 24, 2009
You whiny, self-indulgent prick. Do you think the authors you interview actually want to be staring at your ugly face?
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, January 23, 2009
You mofos took all this TARP money and spent it on your own bonuses and lavish offices. Where is the liquidity in the market? The US government should go after you crooks and seize all your assets. And if you don't like it, flee the country and don't ever come back.
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, January 23, 2009
I send hate missiles raining down on you. And your phone, since you obviously don't use it.
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, January 22, 2009
I declare war on you, fucking rat bastard fuck pissers! You kill every lucid dream I have by buzzing around my ears, and make me scratch my legs like a dog with mother fucking fleas because you bite me there, AND NOW WHAT YOU TINY PIECES OF SHIT! YOU'RE CARRYING DENGUE FEVER ALL THE WAY FROM THE MOTHER...
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Declared by Insects are Bitches on Tuesday, January 20, 2009
We dated for 2 years and then you dumped me because I was to clingy. You stupid cunt it was because we were lovers at that point and I'm sure anyone would do the same. Now you are dating my "friend" and being the stupidest, worst couple to hang out with. Despite thinking everything is going so great,...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 20, 2009
I hear all of the stupid shit heads out there saying that going to a school that is not a state school is a waste of time and will ruin your life. A degree is a degree and I'm gonna get a job anyway so leave me the fuck alone you lame ass future cubical prairie dogs.
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 20, 2009
STOP! Look around, what the fuck are you doing? Are you just going to work in the service industry all of your life? Quite getting depressed and fat and half-ass content with your tv and your hard-earned blackberry and check out your own oppressed state! Find something to live for! Help your fellow man!...
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, January 18, 2009
I declare jihad on YOU! You, sitting there on your spiffy mac laptop, drinking that starbucks! YOU THINK YOU'RE SO HIP....well guess what? You are not special. You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else!
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, January 17, 2009