Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoThis man is a bloody bastard motherfucker. He is tormenting me just because I did not get him some whisky or rum. He is my senior, though he does not directly supervise me - but keeps on bugging me by making nasty comments. I wish I had some way to blow his balls off.
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Declared by Oppressed on Tuesday, April 1, 2008
I declare jihad on you, asshole!
Why don't you get your head out of your ass and design an application that actually works, mother fucker?
Screw you!
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Declared by Apple and Microsoft Suck Ass on Monday, March 31, 2008
I hereby declare Jihad on the cowards threatening LiveLeak Staff, who are so cowardly they cannot even show their faces!
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Declared by Richy Dong on Saturday, March 29, 2008
I declare Jihad on Richard Hoey! For crimes against journalism!
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Declared by Mr Pulse on Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Stop calling my number and ask if you can please talk to Mrs. ______(my last name). If I refuse to cooperate with you do not try to find out if there is a wife you can speak with.
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, March 21, 2008
A different bicycle every other day, a different cell phone and every single one of them just a pile of junk you got from someone you know. Stop being so goddamn fickle. And sneaky. We're supposed to be friends.
You offer to share a joint, which is about the size of a thumbnail, and say that we can put...
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Declared by Adobo Fiend on Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Hey, motherfucker. You had me paint your football hero. You decided "Hey, I'm white and I'm right, so I don't have to pay!" Perhaps you had no money to pay for it, perhaps you just believed you were entitled to two weeks of my life. Perhaps you're a stealing cunt that needs to be disemboweled with a wooden...
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Declared by Fail on Tuesday, March 18, 2008
"We'll be surprising the winner in their home town!"
Guess that rules out every single person who is watching the show right now, eh? At least, the ones who haven't already gotten a call from HG TV telling them that they've won so they can be in the right place for the oh-so-set-up and contrived...
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Declared by Jackie on Sunday, March 16, 2008
I know it's probably not the dog's fault that its owners trained it to be violent. It's also not the dog's fault that they decided to have such a dangerous animal in a neighborhood full of kids.
In fact, none of it is the dog's fault, but a jihad is the least I could do after I found my cat in pieces on...
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Declared by Tracy on Friday, March 14, 2008
jihad on this day as im not gonna get either!
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, March 14, 2008
I'm gonna put a jihad on you because you haven't mentioned Moggy enough lately, and it's this that has let the team down, urself down and more importantly Moggy down herself!
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, March 13, 2008
Jihad on the fat slut my husband is screwing. You manipulative, lying cow. Eight months pregnant to your husband (or someone) and still bonking someone else's man. You TOLD me you targeted my husband. What kind of ho bag ARE you? You wrecked our marriage, good on you, that's what you wanted. The best...
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Declared by Retribution on Thursday, March 13, 2008
You are a cancer in the office.
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, March 12, 2008
What in the hell are you thinking? This is not going to end well. If he doesn't know yet, he will. If he knows and doesn't care then why are you with him?
If you love me like you say you do then grow a pair and walk away from him. If you're trying to make it work like you say you are then grow a pair...
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Declared by The guy across the way on Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Another month goes by and I can't make my mortgage payment. How pathetic is it that I'm sitting here reading up on defaulting and voluntary foreclosure?
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Declared by Broke-ass on Tuesday, March 11, 2008
For being a complete assfart penis.
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Declared by George W. Bush on Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Fuck having twins. Just fuck it.
I swear, I want to kill these goddamn wads of flesh sometimes. I wouldn't actually DO it, of course...but the urge is there. There's got to be some out-of-the-way dumpsters I could toss them in, right?
All I want is a few minutes of quiet - a moment alone - a cigarette...
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Declared by Loving mother on Monday, March 10, 2008
You taught me so much and brought me so far. I can't imagine what my life would have been like without you in it - you were my life. I am as whole and strong as I am today only because of you.
I swear that your death was not my idea, even though I was there and I agreed to it. Please understand that it...
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Declared by Angry on Monday, March 10, 2008
How does filling in a bubble measure your intelligence when all the bubbles are possible 'best' answers and you give us only one choice?
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Declared by Pissed-off test-taker on Monday, March 10, 2008
I rented it because it had Sarah Silverman on the cover. Now, after what feels like the longest 20 minutes of my entire life, having not yet seen a single glimpse of her on the screen, I am giving up to watch my dog lick his dick instead. It's more entertaining.
Is this all it takes to make a movie in...
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Declared by Wasted Netflix account on Monday, March 10, 2008