Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoI hereby delare that you, Kevin Brown, are no subject to a jihad, issued under the authority of His Righteous Majesty Craig (Warden of Hulme), Your jihad is the result of your failure to wash-up in a manner of which I approve.
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Declared by Craig on Monday, October 8, 2007
Okay, here's the thing: if you are going to flip out and have a conniption about my boyfriend asking his brother (your "hubby") to come and talk to him about to be in his wedding without you, then don't get your brain fucking twisted about us not being too happy about you and your "hubby" inviting him to a...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, April 13, 2010
I hate the fact my horrible mother seldom sleeps. It's now about 5 minutes before 6:00 a.m. on Thursday, and my hideous mom has been awake since 10:00 a.m. on Tuesday. During this whole time, she's been pacing, reading a book, dragging a chair against the tile floor, and constantly flushing the toilet and...
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Declared by anon on Thursday, June 4, 2015
My stupid grandmother who is really god damned corrupt and tells lies in order to get my grandfather to get pissed off at me .
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Declared by Isabella Perez on Monday, May 11, 2015
Jihad on you Mofo!!!
I dont understand why you gave birth to me ?
I am your daughter , you should not be looking at me in the wrong places....fuck you !!! Asshole .. mother fucking asshole....dick sucker...disgusting bitch....jihad on your wretched fucking eyes that hover on me in a dirty way all the...
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Declared by cryingoutloud on Saturday, October 6, 2012
I fucking hate you. You're the reason this family has problems. And yes you *are* indeed an idiot. Don't you EVER fucking come to me wondering why I don't talk to you or why I don't want to be around you. DON'T YOU FUCKING TELL ME TO CHANGE! *YOU* FUCKING CHANGE YOU SHITTY EXCUSE FOR A FATHER! HOW can you...
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Declared by Mary on Tuesday, May 7, 2013
I strongly dislike the Sabbath I've spent with my family. It sucked a big time! I don't care to sit with a little kid who whines all the time about his food. It takes forever to satisfy him. Pain in the ass!!!
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, May 6, 2014
There's something wrong with the gays who scream that they hate the opposite sex- especially their own opposite sex parent - disturbing.
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Declared by anon. on Saturday, April 1, 2017
YOU ARE FILTHY PEASANTS
Also like am I not allowed to complain about anything because "aw poor you emotional teenager???" like I HAVE A REASON TO BE ANGRY, this isn't some strop about nothing. You never listen, and then moan at me for using the electricity when I could get a new one for 2 quid.
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Declared by Bob fucking marley on Saturday, April 19, 2014
I hate myself!
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Declared by Mark Barrett on Monday, October 8, 2007
I hate fucking dead beat loser dads....all you mother fucker should carry a sign saying you are worthless dad, so all the good women in the world will know to stay the fuck away from you. Some boys need to grow up and be a man......saying you are a man doesn't make you so.....middle finger in the air for all...
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Declared by a venting single mother on Monday, October 8, 2007
For being an arrogant pain in the arse .
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Declared by Richard on Tuesday, May 18, 2010
What annoys me is when someone has been gossiping about me. It really annoys me alot!! Esp when it comes back into my ears. Why would you talk about me? Something that I know I will react to. I dont talk about other people usually. But I will react when I find out someone's been gossiping about me!!
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Declared by dfgdfg on Thursday, July 14, 2011
I like to put strawberry syrup in your mother’s milk, God willing, a cinnamon star gets its wings tonight.
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Declared by ralph on Monday, February 28, 2011
Dearest mummy,
I'm sick and fuging tried of your bullcrap obbsession with searching for the slut my father is cheating on you with on myspace and making me search for her and spy on her as well....wasn't it you who said you wwouldn't give a damn if he did? SHUT UP AND MOVE ON ALREADY DAMMIT!!!...
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Declared by Dearest daughter on Sunday, November 22, 2009
I just want some damn privacy!
O.K. it may be 'your house' despite it being a flat but I fucking visit you on weekends. I love you but you really piss me off. When you're acting like a dick but I turn out to be the damn villain.
And whenever I leave my laptop on the couch does not give you an invitation...
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Declared by Your SON on Sunday, January 2, 2011
We love her dont get me wrong but she can be just ahhh. She's always so negative about everything and just talks about her problems all the time. im like yes i get it your lifes a bit rap but we all have problems too and sometimes she all like purposely depressed..
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Declared by Jade on Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Jihad on you. If you were any kind of loving son you would have been there for your mom but all you ever called for was about her bank statement now you act like you care since she's sick.You can fool her but I shame on you for calling day and night checking on insurance policies.
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Declared by See right thru you on Monday, March 18, 2013
For not visiting me in Leipzig until NOW!
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Declared by laurence on Monday, October 8, 2007
For not minding his own business.
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Declared by Debs on Tuesday, May 18, 2010