Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, July 1, 2011
It is with grave determination to preserve the teachings of holy Islam and to uphold my submission to Allah the Merciful by declaring Jihad on you and your wretched family. Be afraid Michael, be very afraid, for Allah will not be merciful to any member of your household.
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Declared by Bob on Tuesday, December 9, 2008
You're, for the most part, an awesome friend. But when I'm getting back into the dating scene, the last thing I need to hear from you is you making comments about my upcoming date that don't matter to me, but still put me in a foul mood because we get into a debate over it and I get annoyed at you. You're...
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, June 13, 2011
You motherfucking shit head!
Stop drinking that fuckingshitpiece of a beer!
Get you a fucking fat ass life you fat piece of shit!
Sorry dad
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Declared by kid on Wednesday, October 10, 2007
He ruined fathers day by being a whiny little bitch, and the next time I see him, I feel like I might just end up beating the shit out of him.
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, June 21, 2009
hypocritical assholes! you both piss me the fuck off. you cry when you find out that i' moving out in a year, and then accuse me of bullshit that isnt even true. fuck you both, and get your shit straight before you open your damn mouths.
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Declared by pissed off on Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Vole si mne nasral pyco sem se zeblitej probudil a pepan rika ze uz nejsu v kapele se di se visrat kokote
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Declared by Ungr on Monday, October 8, 2007
A friend asked me how I deal with my mil, who everyone can see does not like me or acknowledge me.
She has never really treated me like family, and at best tolerates me. She is not involved in my childrens lives at all, NEVER has been.
I used to be offended sometimes even hurt by her behavior. I took it...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, November 29, 2011
You are the grossest hillbilly bitch that I have ever had the displeasure of knowing in my entire life. You may have been someone decent before, but now you're just an obese, toothless, alcoholic who parades around and acts like something that came straight off of Jerry Springer. You can go fuck yourself and...
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, November 23, 2012
For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Matthew 16:26
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, July 17, 2011
Well....boy problems, I have none. I shall complain about my past. Theres this girl called S. And she was a "friend" I hung out for six months. She was so pushy!! I went on holidays with her and all she would do is yell if she didnt get her way. So the friendship was basically me (being the nice person I...
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Declared by sfwerw on Saturday, July 9, 2011
Jihad on you Mofo!!!
I dont understand why you gave birth to me ?
I am your daughter , you should not be looking at me in the wrong places....fuck you !!! Asshole .. mother fucking asshole....dick sucker...disgusting bitch....jihad on your wretched fucking eyes that hover on me in a dirty way all the...
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Declared by cryingoutloud on Saturday, October 6, 2012
For being an arrogant pain in the arse .
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Declared by Richard on Tuesday, May 18, 2010
This is the last time I lend you loo roll, just for you to stink out the bathroom.
Certainly worths a Jihad.
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, October 7, 2007
YOU WORTHLESS, INBRED, DUMBASS, ANNOYING TRUCK DRIVING PIECE OF SHIT! YOU HAVE RUINED SO MUCH OF MY LIFE IT'S NOT EVEN A CLICHE TO SAY IT! I'M A GLAD YOU WENT TO JAIL AND SURE I MAY HAVE FORGIVEN YOU BU TYOU ARE STILL A WORTHLESS ASSHOLE! I HAVE LEARNING AND BEHAVIOR PROBLEMS BECAUSE OF YOU! I FUCKING HATE...
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Declared by PissedOff@Dad on Monday, May 7, 2012
You want to call me a bitch, I dont care if your we were drunk motherfucker. The psychological jihad has started and your ass is cut off from my circle bitch. Im no longer your cousin freddy kruger looking faggot. I hope you turn homo when you go to state jail.
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Declared by Your 2nd Cousin on Saturday, February 18, 2012
Fuck you
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, November 10, 2012
you should have died you fucking whore.
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, September 28, 2010
My mom told me to clean my room yesterday. Okay, Mom, I can’t today because I have a shit’s worth of homework. I’ll do it tomorrow. Fine, tomorrow, she says. I come home today with a shit’s worth and a half of homework and my room is stormed. My mom thought it would help me the fuck along if she just...
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, December 16, 2010
SO. I am leaving for college in less than one year. I am currently a senior in high school. and i, along with the majority of the teenage population, am treated like a child. My mother won't let me make my own breakfast because she says I "won't make it nutritious enough". She still checks my texts and...
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Declared by sydney on Monday, August 11, 2014