Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoIn the name of Allah, the all-knowing, the magnificent I declare you an infidel and swear on the beard of the prophet that you shall be utterly wasted this evening, Inshallah.
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Declared by Dr. Evil on Monday, October 15, 2007
Jihad on the notion that cancer is something to be "fought" or "battled". Unlike a a simplified fear-based soundbite, cancer is a highly intricate and orchestrated healing mechanism of the body, which can be guided into a positive outcome, rather than further coaxed with toxic chemicals into a spiraling...
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Declared by person-face on Wednesday, August 5, 2009
=)
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Declared by someone you likely don't know on Tuesday, March 9, 2010
It's so small and puny!
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Declared by Skully on Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Is that all you have. Pathetic. I am sitting back laughing so hard at you right now, trying to scramble around and find something to get on me. Pathetic.
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, July 8, 2011
put on more simpsons and family guy
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, June 1, 2013
Get. Out. Of. My. WAY!!! Why are you all awake and driving this early in the morning? This is my one chance to make it to the office in a reasonable amount of time and you're ruining it!!! There's no reason why it should take me 1.5 hours to drive 28 miles at 5AM...
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Declared by Dave on Friday, September 14, 2007
jihad na tebaaaa
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Declared by jakubko on Monday, October 8, 2007
Hey You,
Yes you. I know who you are the one that she calls "You Know Who" the one who puts a wedge between me and my former friend. I don't really blame you I know that it was not completely your fault. But why do you have to be here now. I hate knowing that we're in the same room. I know you saw me look...
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Declared by PJ on Friday, November 30, 2007
I know trivial facts! Admit it!
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Declared by You know who! on Saturday, April 20, 2013
10‰ is baaaad
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Declared by Jihad al Beer on Sunday, October 7, 2007
For general pisstaking - saying we're going the machine, then taking a further 4 hours to go round the office asking everyone what they want
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Declared by Gore on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
This is the last straw! I have had it with your short, bitter, feathered ass! You don't mess with a dude's benz and get away with it. And by the way, you call me Goofy one more time you crack smokin', walking personality disorder, and I will bury your ass next to Walt. It's Shabaz Ahmed. It's been legal...
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Declared by Shabaz Ahmed (The artist formally known as Goofy) on Tuesday, October 30, 2007
I said Hello but what I ment was FUCK YOU!
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Declared by fuck you all and your mother on Friday, April 24, 2009
My calves are sore because some phone monkey lost his car!
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Declared by Hodge on Sunday, November 11, 2007
For being ginger...and not even a day-walker.
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, February 6, 2008
I declare jihad on YOU!!!
Every time I reach out with my arms wide open, you turn your face away from me like you don't fucking notice me. I'm NOT a rapist, I'm just a huggy person!! There's a difference you know.
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Declared by Huggy Person on Wednesday, April 8, 2009
There's no excuse for rude, verbally abusive behavior from retail sales staff. Yesterday morning, June 27, 2017, I stopped by Crossroads Trading Co. in Studio City, California (a community in Los Angeles) in order to sell them two pairs of shoes that were in good condition, and I was treated horribly. The...
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Declared by insulted customer on Wednesday, June 28, 2017
You thought i forgot about last time? You fat slob. You are fat and disgusting and you eat everybody's food without even asking. I hope your body belt breaks and you stomach falls down to your knees. This guy steals food from poor kids and clothes that dont even fit him from the salvation army.
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Declared by Mike da Don on Tuesday, October 2, 2007
jihad on firefox, your subsystem leaks more than a bombed out oil-rig!
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 8, 2007