Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoI am jihading your ass for reopening closed bugs that are already fixed.
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Declared by Verminator on Thursday, October 25, 2007
Why are you such an ass? Give me a raise already. It's been two years and I do 90% of the work in this place.
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Declared by Coproducer on Thursday, December 6, 2007
You are such a dick sometimes! Shut the fuck up with your dumb-ass Jewish jokes already, and learn how to pronounce Ricci ("ree-chee" not "ree-kee," you moron). I know you didn't even fucking ask Doug if Nate and Ronnie could come with--you're selfish and want to always be the center of attention--can't have...
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, May 4, 2009
Dear Gatekeeper, thank you for making me suffer all these years thinking
about you. I almost risked going the deep end recently, but I finally
convinced myself that you are just pretending to like me back in college.
You don't know the hell I have gone through just to work things out, that
one...
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Declared by Keymaster on Tuesday, August 12, 2014
We hate you forever
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Declared by Don't Worry About It on Monday, June 25, 2012
American civil jihad
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Declared by dhor on Friday, March 22, 2013
Can you all leave me the fuck alone!? I know I'm a bit of a pushover but if I say I can't cover your shift or stay an extra four hours, let it go! Don't just assume Ill say yes and put me on the schedule for that slot without telling me! I've covered for you bastards a million times. But I'm a terrible...
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, February 20, 2014
Thanks for leaving me out. ALWAYS. YOU DON'T EVEN CARE FOR ME. I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND. YOU TWO ARE DATING AND YOU DON'T FUCKING KNOW HOW I FEEL.
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Declared by :( on Wednesday, December 23, 2015
My fucking birch of a mum just told me that it's my fault that I am ugly and fat, and not to come crying to her when i feel so awful and depressed. All because I ate some cake and chocolate today. She's the motherfucking obese lady, how dare she fucking talk to me like that.
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, March 4, 2015
You didn't freaking tell us we could retake one test per year, you infidel!
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Declared by A & E on Thursday, May 28, 2009
go fucking die both of you, you stupid slags have done nothing but make me depressed!
charley: your boyfriend doesnt love you you fucking annoy him like you annoy everyone within a 20 mile radius you ginger whore cunt
Jamie: you skank ! you get paid a shit wage how the fuck are you going to even manage...
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, August 7, 2010
lsfkjasldfjalsifj
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, June 1, 2013
it was an unfortunate event two years ago when we hired you. first off, you suck at dog grooming. how many times a week do i have to cover your ass by gluing a dogs ear back to its head? "he shook it right into the scissors" you say. how does a SEDATED dog turn his head into a pair of scissors that you are...
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Declared by disgruntled vet tech on Monday, September 10, 2007
Great! Thanks so much, Fido. It's bad enough that you apparently can't aim your furry hunchback well enough to hit the enormous grassy area two inches from where you left your delightful little "package" for me to discover. But you also concealed it under a clump of leaves so that I didn't notice I had...
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Declared by Trevor on Monday, September 10, 2007
Destroy SmartDataHQ
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, October 7, 2007
alleen al op uw zululippen
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Declared by postcrew on Monday, October 8, 2007
F*CK POP IDOl, Star academia and things like that...
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Declared by Will on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
You do mockup like my ass!
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Declared by Jihad on Wednesday, October 17, 2007
you gave me the best night i have ever had. you were sweet, romantic, funny... everything i ever wanted in a guy. you were the first one i've ever felt good about. you made me so happy. we hated to be apart, but that one night reminded us that distance doesnt always matter. you know what? you fucked that up....
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Declared by twentyone. on Saturday, December 6, 2008
Oh, come on! She's an airhead and a total nitwit with no brains, because she posted a ridiculous video on her social media page about some pretentious, pompous British guy saying that his little six year-old daughter gave an hour-long lecture about "smashing the patriarchy" and some other trash about how...
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Declared by No PC trash on Monday, September 4, 2017