Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoWhy are you such a two-faced bitch? Quit harassing your teachers until they have mental breakdowns. Nobody likes you and I hope you get raped in the ass repeatedly while being forced to fill out all of your own pointless forms.
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, May 24, 2016
Your little schemes don't fool me! Give a hundred here, give a hundred there, always asking for money...speaking of stories that no one saw so no one can prove! TV evangelists who perform "miracles" on the air...yeah right! If you want to scam, start a pyramid scheme you evil idiots.
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Declared by Simbad on Monday, September 10, 2007
Screw your crappy ass driving abilities. Learn what yield means instead of trying to hit me because your lane runs out and your to stupid to read. Learn to step on the damn gas pedal. AND learn to be in the lane you need to be to take an exit instead of always being in the left lane and trying to take a...
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Declared by Bob Barker on Monday, September 10, 2007
Hell on earth. Creaking, understaffed, tatty, dirty, smelly, a service culture that makes a mockery of the word, and a black hole for your bags.
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Declared by Exasperated on Sunday, October 7, 2007
no more of your unearthly tunes please!
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Declared by devil boy on Monday, October 8, 2007
Go home already so he can shut up!
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Declared by Not so plain white T on Monday, October 8, 2007
A curse on you and your Infidel Vibrator!
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Declared by Ted on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Hey man, what the HECK is your problem? I thought we were cool dude! You used to sit on my desk and give me peanuts and now that you're all out of nuts, you stare at me all day long with those "do me" eyes and you're constantly trying to force yourself on me. I DON'T WANT TO MAKE OUT WITH YOU!! OK? Do...
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Declared by Jon on Thursday, October 11, 2007
Tell me about the gawd-dawg soup mix, NOW!
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Declared by Chris S. on Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Wankstain of a teacher @ the shittiest skool in teh south
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Declared by 4 chan party van on Friday, November 2, 2007
Being sick of the telestalking machines is not a reason to send chain letters. Please stop sending e-mails regarding the ways to deal with them. If someone wants to get rid of the telestalking calls they can contact the local BBB-like organizations.
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Never in the history of skankdom has such a despicable whore rolled out of a puss-soaked bed as LRS. This trollop is a cock-sucking homewrecker. There is absolutely nothing she won't put in her mouth and blow on. She is a tease, a tramp, a delight to the ides (of March - she's best at stabbing in the back...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, May 5, 2009
human beings are not HERBIVORES! nature decided they should eat other animals lower on the evolutionary ladder! eat a pork chop you pussy (by the way this isn't the site to get into some religious debate OK?!)
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Declared by Carnivore on Sunday, May 24, 2009
This bitch fucking pisses me off. For three months I've been chasing her, and all she gives is mixed signals. She refuses to say she likes me and be my gf yet she keeps going on dates with me. She is a fucking tease that is leading me on. My whole summer revolved around her and she is driving me into the...
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Declared by Shiv on Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Your stupid policies on authorising FAMILY MEMBERS to collect postal articles should earn you a real JIHAD. Death to all old-fashioned policy-makers!!
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Declared by Your once faithful customer on Monday, July 20, 2009
Anyone who declares a holy war against the best computer in the world should be punished. JIHAD ON YOUBEEYATCH!!
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Declared by Annonymous on Monday, December 14, 2009
I felt fucking awesome when you accepted me into your school, because you're an IVY LEAGUE. but when you didn't give me enough financial aid to reasonably attend, AND after I poured my heart into a letter explaining why you've been my dream school for 4 fucking years, you replied with "we're sorry, we can't...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, April 10, 2012
when you struck my vehicle on the freeway today, you gave the officer your driver's license and then FAILED to exit the next offramp for the report writing. WTF.
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Declared by anony on Thursday, July 18, 2013
Lunchladies are annoying! They yell at you, stalk you, ban everything, and can't even pronounce a single fucking name! I DECLARE JIHAD ON YOU BITCHES! I KNOW YOU ARE OUT THERE MR PAMPERS (nickname for a male lunchlady)
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Declared by 22warriorcat22 on Monday, September 23, 2013
Nigger. 8========D ~~~ your face, JEW!
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Declared by 8======D on Thursday, December 12, 2013