Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoIn the name of Allah, the super duper great and his prophet..
I am to declare Jihad on the weather!! it brings rain to the infidels and sun to the Jews and evel Christian Teddy Bears. I, in the name of Allah the great say we should use our black gold(oil) to destroy the weather ones and for all.
Peace...
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Declared by Nice Abu-Muslim to Everyone Kareem on Friday, December 7, 2007
You are too loud, dammit. You cackle endlessly at conferences and make Michael Serra nervous and uncomfortable. Everyone is staring at you - and not in a good way. They think you're insane. Your clothing doesn't match either, which is a problem.
For all of that, somehow we all love you. You suck a lot...
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, February 10, 2008
I'm sick and tired of those drivers having to honk in the streets. A driver turning right slows them down - they honk. A driver asks a pedestrian for directions - the driver after them has to honk. This noise make me sick to my stomach.
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, October 7, 2007
1. If you are dumb - don't talk.
2. If you think you are smart you are more than likely 1.
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Declared by Sumdumguy on Monday, October 8, 2007
Because!
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Declared by Vincent on Monday, October 8, 2007
I declare a jihad on you horsey people who give your kids (aka Spawn of Satan) horses at 11 years old and send them out as some kind of jihad against the ordinary public. Your spawn of Satan have no control over these horses and are a danger to society at large.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, November 21, 2011
For working 247 in ibanking instead of startuping!
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Declared by laurence on Monday, October 8, 2007
I declare ALL OUT WAR on you...
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Declared by Squirrel Stew Lover on Tuesday, October 16, 2007
i hate you
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, May 2, 2017
This is the last straw! I have had it with your short, bitter, feathered ass! You don't mess with a dude's benz and get away with it. And by the way, you call me Goofy one more time you crack smokin', walking personality disorder, and I will bury your ass next to Walt. It's Shabaz Ahmed. It's been legal...
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Declared by Shabaz Ahmed (The artist formally known as Goofy) on Tuesday, October 30, 2007
For omitting the apostrophe and the letter e from the word, "you're." May a swarm of yellow jacketsland on your chest and bite you in your ass. Again.
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Declared by Grammar Nazi on Thursday, October 4, 2007
Flee the hence from my life or I'll call you on your bullshit.
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Declared by JK on Friday, October 12, 2007
We've toyed with the indfidels long enough...let there arrogant swagger do them in. We've sent the locusts once against the Yankees...May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits.
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Declared by Red Sox Nation on Thursday, October 18, 2007
I declare a jihad on you for not acknowledging my presence and for not being online late into the night!
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Declared by Crocy on Sunday, November 11, 2007
Mimi D. on the west coast is a total schmuck, because she's rude and says she's proud of it - she actually said that. She said she's superior to "all other beings", which proves what an idiot she really is. Mimi D. deserves to get run over by a truck. Mimi D. on the west coast is a piece of garbage. Mimi...
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, July 19, 2014
put on more simpsons and family guy
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, June 1, 2013
Joe,
I am disappointed that you have not been returning my phone calls. As a direct result of your actions. I have declared a jihad on you.
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Declared by Johnny Ruhlen on Sunday, October 7, 2007
Im back on this site. Hehehehe! Nope, really going to stay away from that other forum. This time i mean it!! Its a death trap (figuratively speaking). Because so many people (i think) are on there. Gives girls more of a reason to talk about me. Anyways, I hope that internet troll on that other site follows...
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Declared by dfgsdfg on Saturday, July 9, 2011
For being an infidel and forsaking your soul on the unholiest of safaris.
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Declared by JDSP III on Monday, June 25, 2012
If we want a poached egg on our toast we should get it. Telling us that it 'won't fit' on the bread and only a fried egg will fit, is just insanity. What ever happened to "The customer is always right?!?!"
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Declared by TIME on Monday, October 8, 2007