Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoBecause you're leaving, and you just don't care anymore.
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Declared by Mark on Tuesday, May 3, 2011
I declare absolute destruction of evil on you. You got a preview with the "twins" and your house falling into the ocean. You are the most miserable beast and your day will come. You are a disgusting beastly awful non-human being and you will pay for your crimes.
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Declared by Be afraid on Wednesday, December 10, 2014
Sends the worst newsletters ever.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 8, 2007
He should just burn in hell
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, October 26, 2007
I declare holy Jihad on the bastard in my office who keeps interrupting me while I declare jihad on my co-workers.
A pox on your winkie infidel.
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Declared by verminator on Friday, November 2, 2007
those tongue-workers who have difficulty correctly writing a document from one language they command proficiently, to their own native tongue, and then they take up their friends' valuable leisure time to finish their own work, without any financial recompense, or leveraging of their financial assets for...
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Declared by abu wakbar al-jihadi make my sandwich with salami on Friday, November 9, 2007
Dear Douchebag,
Having an iPod Touch does not make you cool. It makes you a douche bag. Especially since you use it to pet photos of dogs on it. Yeah, we caught ya.
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Declared by Coworkers on Monday, October 8, 2007
You're always so busy when anyone else needs something - writing that bullshit email, cleaning your desk, picking a wedgie from your 200lb ass. (I just threw up in my mouth a little) All I want is the phone number for the Human Resources office, but you're too busy. "Come back tomorrow!" I've got an idea,...
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Declared by FUKWURK on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
May your desk burn at the hands of Ala.
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, October 10, 2007
How great is this website?
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Declared by Johnson on Thursday, May 28, 2015
I am Steven Coltart, the CEO of programmer.net and owner of many unmoderated forums such as Bad Harvest and Jihad on You.
A particular employee of mine, SaraAdmin, has been continually disrespecting me. She has posted several rants about me on this site and is disobeying the ADMINISTRATIVE CODE. As such,...
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Declared by SteveAdmin on Sunday, January 20, 2013
alleen al op uw zululippen
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Declared by postcrew on Monday, October 8, 2007
You started with all this enthusiasm. Pointing out all the faults with our app. We declared we already knew. The app is old and was touched by many hands prior to yours. The old devs were long gone. "I will fix it!" you declared with enthusiasm. Ah but alas, now the app is riddled with your unfinished...
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Declared by Internal Developer on Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Så se dog for helvede at få den forbandede eksportfunktion lavet!!! Det kan sgu da ikke være så svært!!! Har I nogen idé om, hvor meget det besværer vores arbejde, at I ikke laver jeres. Nu har I lovet at lave den i syv måneder!!!! Fuck, det for meget!!!
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Declared by Sur kone on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
I often hear you talking about the Eagles - I think you grew up in Texas so SHUT THE FUCK UP. The Cowboys just fucked them up.
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Declared by M. The Tech on Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Hey, motherfucker. You had me paint your football hero. You decided "Hey, I'm white and I'm right, so I don't have to pay!" Perhaps you had no money to pay for it, perhaps you just believed you were entitled to two weeks of my life. Perhaps you're a stealing cunt that needs to be disemboweled with a wooden...
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Declared by Fail on Tuesday, March 18, 2008
These damn moths have invaded our building and are everywhere... further more a 'moth expert' is now telling us this should last for 7-10 days!!!
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Declared by Hodge on Sunday, October 7, 2007
for laughing at me when I hurt my foot
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, May 3, 2011
My boss is a raging bitch...there's no better way to put it. I am convinced that she was put on this earth for the sole reason of making each workday worse than the last. It's pretty fucked up when i stop think about it...each day i go to work and run an internal monologue saying, "there's no way today is...
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, October 14, 2007
You annoying son of a bitch? You think you can boss around when the manager is away? You think that by sucking his cock all the time you are qualified to manage our work
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Declared by ? on Thursday, June 28, 2018