Are you serious?
Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoJihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoI'm so addicted to pornography and its taking over my life :(
FOR THAT REASON, I DECLARE JIHAD ON MYSELF
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Declared by Jihadi Jihadist on Saturday, May 26, 2018
The hell with interviewers who think I am inferior just because I was fired from my last job. What the hell is this? What the hell have I done to deserve it?
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 15, 2007
I'm sick and tired of getting those calls for people looking for Daniel, when there's no fucking Daniel in this number.
Wrong number!!! How many times will I have to tell you that?
I hope the one to whom I said yesterday that I'm fed up with people looking for Daniel will read this.
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Declared by A Phone Owner on Wednesday, November 7, 2007
WHY YOU DO THIS
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, November 9, 2007
I declare a motherfucking jihad on you and your family. You are worthless piece of cowshit and it's not over yet.
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, December 20, 2015
The North Hollywood division of the Los Angeles Police Department has dirty police officers who snitch, especially just west of the intersection of Ventura Blvd. and Laurel Canyon Blvd. These are corrupt cops who make false accusations against other cops.
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Declared by anon. on Saturday, April 1, 2017
You smelly, dumb, mooing, fat, block the road, knock over the fence bastards who wouldn't even exist in this fucking world if it weren't for humans taking care of you. You should all die and be processed into tasty meats.
Because you sure are tasty.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 8, 2007
Seriously, it all sucks, and then when you point this out aggrieved little whiny bastards who stake their entire identity on what is spoonfed to them by big business feel hurt for some stupid reason and start calling you an "elitist."
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Declared by Gregor Samsa on Thursday, October 11, 2007
I place upon you a jihad in the name of Allah, due to the fact that it is politically incorrect to shag sheep all day and claim that you're straight
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Declared by SpongeBob on Friday, January 11, 2008
Where are you with your weak little electric mower? I walked out of my front door this morning and was greeted by a herd of elephants who have apparently taken up residence in the jungle that used to be my yard. Luckily, they stampeded in the general direction of the parking lot, so a path was cleared and I...
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Declared by That old man down the street on Friday, May 16, 2008
You are the biggest lowlife ever, go get a job, scumbag, and maybe get up and do something for once
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Declared by trololol on Saturday, November 26, 2011
LIAR! you and you're girlfriend. young father. sad you didnt get to even attend graduation.
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, November 24, 2012
You're tech is shit, you fucked up youtube, you stalk us for fucking ads, and google, just an all around bull shit company. Have a chromebook, lost all of my fucking work. "we automatically save" FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
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Declared by I hate everything on Sunday, August 10, 2014
You have made my life a living hell and you blame ME? What goes around, comes around. ED, yr ass wiper, your health, your job, your kid.....it's payback time. Carry on blaming me you perfect piece of shit. IDGAF. What you hate YOU created, not me. Go bully someone else you abusive animal. My time is NOW.
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Declared by The "Wrong" One on Friday, November 6, 2015
Die, niggers, DIE!!!!
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Declared by PE on Sunday, October 7, 2007
I hope you rot in hell and then hell vultures eat you off and I hope they take all the time in the world when they do so. at that.
I just hope that you get a skunk on your face. And then rhinos should trample over your big head. And when you die, I hope you rot in hell and then hell vultures eat you off...
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, April 22, 2017
I’m putting a practice Jihad on my buddy TJ.
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Declared by Jason on Monday, August 28, 2017
fuck you mr fucking himnawengfnksvzdcxjdawqyuszckncdhczh jmnnbbn ndcxs fx mcbvhhdforhjvh km fuck you mi9sterm hicvndskccvkm,
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Declared by scD F on Thursday, October 12, 2017
I wonder how you manage to be so successful. I hate how you had offered me to join your business. We'd met once, then I made some research so we can continue together. Then I have to try time and time again to call you and schedule another meeting. And some sunny day you tell me to call you the next day. The...
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, June 21, 2008
I declare war at faulty values, the deathism in particularly. Mostly all religious people can be tagged as deathists. And almost all atheists too. They want to die of old age eventually. They want me to grow old and die, they want you to die the same way, everyone. Is not it freaky? They say it's "natural"....
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Declared by Ev on Monday, August 18, 2008