Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoYou fucking bitch. I tried so hard, waking up at the ass Crack of dawn to do my makeup and shit, and you come prancing by, and with a finger snap he likes you. What. The. HELL. and the boy, your a real douchbag. Fucking crusty ass can take it up the ass. Jokes on you, you just got jihad bitches. Have fun in...
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, December 3, 2015
Damn you Bose, for confusing uninformed lazy consumers with disposable income into buying your disgustingly overpriced home audio products. Damn you to hell...
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Declared by robert on Monday, September 10, 2007
Why do people talk to me about stuff I don't care about? Am I just too nice of a person to tell them to fuck off. If I am saying "Yeah", "Right", "Uh-huh" it's because I don't have anything to say and I couldn't care less about your problems. Chances are I just want to get off the phone and stab myself in...
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Declared by Ted on Thursday, September 20, 2007
So, uh, we removed your graffiti and we know where you live. We also sent a letter to your mom's landlord and the cops have your spraycan.
You want to scare me, become a lawyer.
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, September 27, 2007
For being a baldy homo.
For changing the rules to suit yourself.
For being a nazi cunt.
For wearing shorts in winter.
For sucking cock.
For being a former monk/dairy farmer.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 8, 2007
How dare you have a voice that sounds like a phone sex operator!
Quit being black!
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Declared by Your Information class on Monday, November 19, 2007
You taught me so much and brought me so far. I can't imagine what my life would have been like without you in it - you were my life. I am as whole and strong as I am today only because of you.
I swear that your death was not my idea, even though I was there and I agreed to it. Please understand that it...
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Declared by Angry on Monday, March 10, 2008
When Americans come and declare war on us when they run out of oil.
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Declared by Ahkmed The Terrorist on Saturday, May 10, 2008
Comcast Community MODS are biased assholes
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, September 14, 2008
Merr. JIHAD ON YOU! Allahu Akbar!
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Declared by Abdullah Hazim Smith on Thursday, September 24, 2009
You are the grossest hillbilly bitch that I have ever had the displeasure of knowing in my entire life. You may have been someone decent before, but now you're just an obese, toothless, alcoholic who parades around and acts like something that came straight off of Jerry Springer. You can go fuck yourself and...
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, November 23, 2012
how can you of all people tell me i ruined my life !! when your the one who gave kids away like they were candy all becouse it wasent in your buddget to buy birthcontrol(drugs were more important) and by they way you dont win mother of the year for being sober for 10sec of the day..how dare you tell my...
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Declared by older and wiser on Friday, February 26, 2010
Fucking faggot!
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, May 10, 2010
FAT BASTARD INTERNET GEEKS, WHO THINK THAT BY CONTROLLING AN INTERNET FORUM YOU ARE CONTROLLING YOUR SAD FUCKING LIFE!! YOUR NOT, GET REAL WE ALL KNOW THAT YOU LIVE ALONE IN A ONE ROOM APARTMENT AND THE LAST WOMAN YOU SAW NAKED WAS YOUR MOM!!!
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, February 14, 2011
A JIHAD ON YOU COCK SMUGGLING ASSHOLE!
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Declared by Muhammed on Friday, January 13, 2012
I fucking declare jihad on myself for being to cheap to get the damn book for my exam in time. I have eight days to write this thing and now I have to wait up to five days for the damn book, because I was hoping it would arrive at the library in time. I'm a fucking moron. Jihad on me.
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Declared by Josefine on Wednesday, May 1, 2013
Damn you, slightly obscured and wobbly mixed-cap text! I thought you wanted XogH8, but no... you wanted x0gHB!!! Horse farts!!!
All I wanted to do was buy my front-row Nickelback tickets, but after two hours, you've relegated me to nosebleed status. I'm a rocker, not friggin' Robert Langdon!!!
Was...
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Declared by Todd E on Wednesday, September 12, 2007
To all the women who take advantage of the decent guys out there.
You are the minx on the back of a rabid dog.
Ready to pounce on the average bloke.
You prepare your hangmans rope in the fog.
As love dazed your hands on our throats to choke.
What was it that you were after at the end...
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Declared by Traol Coladis on Monday, October 8, 2007
For (style) crimes against humanity!
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Declared by The Style Inquisitor on Monday, October 8, 2007
So tired and bored of shallow and stupid gay men, that are convinced that lifestyle has anything to do with who they decide to sleep with. Isn't it bad enough that as a gay man I've got a chance with less than 10% of the population to begin with? Now 90% of this 10% happen to be idiots. So bored of it.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 8, 2007