Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoI am so sick of you lying fuckfaces who act like genuine human beings for YEARS, saying all the right things and convincing me that I can trust you because, hey, YOU'RE not a lying motherfucker from hell like the last guy, and then all at once, when *I* fucking need help for a change, you pour out all of...
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Declared by Kay on Friday, October 14, 2011
IS AS THICK AS TWO SHORT PLANKS
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Declared by Georgina on Monday, February 13, 2012
Hey Douche Bag. Wanna play games with me? Check for an I.E.D. under your bed, your car, even your mailbox shit head.
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Declared by Jackie Jihad on Wednesday, April 18, 2012
You're were my boyfriend and so we broke up because we weren't working. Why did you not care about me enough to make it work?! I'm so angry at you. I want to shake you and hurt you until I can break down your walls... But I won't, because I shouldn't have to convince someone to fight for me.
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Declared by Rachel on Thursday, May 3, 2012
I hope you treat them as bad as you treat me. Hypocritical dick! I should have ended it the first time you hit me!
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Declared by MakaeylaZamora on Thursday, May 30, 2013
Fuck you. You've been ruling my mother fucking life since day 1. Sexually harassing me every day, touching my butt saying "tight ass". Yelling at mom, my brother and me. All you fucking do is sit around watching TV, smoking and drinking. I hope you fucking die in hell bitch. Burn in hell and I hope you...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, June 10, 2014
Why the HELL do you think i would be ok with you coming up to me and you telling me TO MY FACE you stopped caring 3 months ago... AND you were dating one of my good friends WHILE WE were dating. AND THEN you expected me to be ok with us STILL dating. NO FREAKING WAY
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, September 3, 2015
Out there on the corner every day and night my Ho's never bring in as much money as they should! They're not shaking that ass like they should. Always out back hitting the pipe instead of riding the pole to make me that money.
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Declared by Pimp on Friday, September 14, 2007
Drivers incapable of merging in traffic! The idea is not to stop and come to a standstill
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Declared by Sam on Sunday, October 7, 2007
A jihad upon you for writing buggy code
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Declared by Ben on Monday, October 8, 2007
Durka Durka Durka ... Muhummad ... Jihad!
This is for Fat Tony, and he deserves a Jihad due to his lack of "Fat" and his name not even remotly being Tony...
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Declared by MH... on Monday, October 8, 2007
Designons ensemble le monde nano de demain...
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Declared by Pinch on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
I declare jihad on all you believers. You substitute your brains with ancient books, thinking with believing and judgement with submission. You trade your desire to comfortably not feeling responsible for anything - your gods and books are - against your (and, if you could, our) freedom. See you in hell...
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Declared by Rene Descartes on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
I declare holy war upon James Blunt. This jar of pink sugar should be torn apart by eight homosexual horses, then run over by a fleet of concrete transport trucks, and then burnt in a steel factory, and then shot, just to make sure.
The timbre of his voice is deeply agonizing and should only be used to...
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Declared by Mr. Tze on Thursday, October 11, 2007
Yeahr, fuck love!
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Declared by ZoR3o on Monday, October 22, 2007
I HAD BETTER GET AN "A" IN INORGANIC, BITCH!
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, May 4, 2009
Jihad on you .You stupid bitch .
Damm you for thinking you better than everyone. you are a un schooled lazy cow who has nothing better to do that talk behind peoples back.you done a shit job in raising you kids and they just as useless as you are and no one care how good you are in bed you fat slut. what...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, February 9, 2010
FUCK!!! FUCK!!! FUCK!!!
Why won't it fucking work!?
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Declared by YouTube Sucks Dick on Thursday, March 4, 2010
Lose the attitude and be more professional you bitch. I never am rude to you so don't be rude to me. I can easily quit this job and put you on the spot to find someone new. Maybe that will give you a reality check and realize that bitchiness and being unprofessional is not a way to keep an employee.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 18, 2010
The Aliens are here. I declare Jihad on you!
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Declared by Simon on Monday, January 17, 2011