Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoJihad against DEJWISH religion !
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Declared by Kalash on Saturday, March 27, 2010
For lying about being a Geologist.
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Declared by Chris on Sunday, May 22, 2011
I will rain fire down upon you and burn you in the deepest circle of hell. you're cutting me out of important meetings and so I will brand you with hell reincarnate
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Why don't you let your friends make there own decisions. You manipulate them all into liking someone that they don't like. LEAVE them be.
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Declared by GirlinLove on Saturday, April 21, 2012
Pfft. I'm just kidding. I love Al Qaeda.
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Declared by Average Amerikan on Monday, December 9, 2013
Drivers incapable of merging in traffic! The idea is not to stop and come to a standstill
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Declared by Sam on Sunday, October 7, 2007
You have plotted jihad many, many times around this world. At the Virgin Lounge in London Airport. In Berlin. In Southeast Asia.
Jihad is your name.
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Declared by Agent Longden on Monday, October 8, 2007
Neznasam ta !!!! jihaaad na tebaaaa jebaaaa :D
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Declared by geno on Monday, October 8, 2007
I must declare JIHAD on you! Look it; you're SHORT, UGLY and CROOKED (he kinda leans to the left)... Not only that, but when I wake up in the morning - HE's THERE.... When, I go to the bathroom - HE's THERE... disgusts me! short little bastard!!
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Declared by Itsy Bitsy Leany Weany on Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he's fed.
Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.
Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.
Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.
Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he...
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Declared by Broke American on Monday, October 15, 2007
For not minding his own business.
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Declared by Debs on Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Is it okay to be racist now?
Is it just about the right time when I can start being a shitty human being? Can I just downtalk and disrespect people at will. Can I look down on them and treat them like sh*t?
Cus if its okay now, than I'm okay with it.
I work part time refurbishing patio decks. I'm...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, June 14, 2011
why is nina so amazing?
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Declared by eliza on Sunday, February 12, 2012
My only wish is that you get stoned in a public market for spamming me.
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Declared by Gay Allah on Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Mother fucker I know you're just using me. You obviously don't see me as a human being, oh you think I'll be your fucking atm. Oi fucktard guess what? You're fucking obvious motherfucker I'm not gonna go and pick you up. I told you I'm busy asshole, Oh fuck don't blame for you not getting a job you fucking...
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Declared by Someguy on Thursday, June 14, 2018
Just coz we don't eat meat doesn't mean we placid you who decide to eat meat Shall feel the Wrath of the Holy One JIHAAAD!
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Declared by ChickPea on Tuesday, October 2, 2007
"I'm placing a jihad on you!"
"Just, like, whatever.."
You will burn in the fires of hell for being such a pathetic way of ending a conversation.
Nothing about you is funny. The people who use you are not funny. The world would be a better place without you.
You are a statement used by a generation...
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Declared by Garry on Monday, October 8, 2007
This fucking programme keeps asking me wether I want to get it updated, AND IT'S NOT EVEN INSTALLED ON MY FUCKING COMPUTER.
Fuck you, Apple. It's in the QuickTime player, isn't it?
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Declared by Mr.Tze on Wednesday, October 10, 2007
I declare holy war upon James Blunt. This jar of pink sugar should be torn apart by eight homosexual horses, then run over by a fleet of concrete transport trucks, and then burnt in a steel factory, and then shot, just to make sure.
The timbre of his voice is deeply agonizing and should only be used to...
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Declared by Mr. Tze on Thursday, October 11, 2007
Professors need to stop giving points to people just because they raised their hand and said something stupid in class. I did not pay thousands of dollars to hear some idiot student talk about how her trip to the Bahamas relates to globalization!
If students have something interesting to say... then...
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Declared by AmericanU on Monday, November 5, 2007