Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoMy broadband has been down for over a month now, you fuckers. Yes, i've disconnected all the cables and rebooted the modem. Yes, i've checked the microfilter. Yes, i've waited for you to do a line test four times now. Yes, I think you're all totally fucking incompetent.
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Declared by Bandrew Mcloud on Friday, October 12, 2007
I declare holy war on all of the unattractive men at Rothberg!
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 29, 2007
they said that there were no aliens....now we see them experimenting on them and using their technology to strenthen their defence.......they should be blasted out into space...those green suited rascals!!!!!
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Declared by brrrrrrrrrravo on Monday, November 12, 2007
Dai Rascallaaan!!
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Jihad on the person/s who killed Sean Taylor, Defensive Back for the Washington Redskins.
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Declared by bw.myers on Thursday, November 29, 2007
Hey You,
Yes you. I know who you are the one that she calls "You Know Who" the one who puts a wedge between me and my former friend. I don't really blame you I know that it was not completely your fault. But why do you have to be here now. I hate knowing that we're in the same room. I know you saw me look...
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Declared by PJ on Friday, November 30, 2007
I declare jihad on Torres, for signing for a team he’s far too good for and in the process dragging them far higher than they deserve to be, thus upsetting the natural order of the universe.
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Declared by Wenger's son on Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Ricky Delgado is the most stuck-up, arrogant piece of dog shit ever to walk the face of the planet. Too bad he can't hide the fact that he was made major sindak in Ateneo by even lesser pices of shit. Ricky is that much of a fucking coward he couldn't do shit. Now he spends the rest of his life trying to...
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Declared by Migs on Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Goddammit! Fucking web filter! Limiting my internet experiences! And you guys who put the fucking thing on these computers! Do you really care if I go on YouTube? NO. So let me watch my videos!!!
And then blocking all of the fucking proxies that I use! That's just mean!
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, February 20, 2009
FAIL. Should it not fill a purpose,like oh i dont know make people not thirst to death? Now its just up in their faces. laughing
And besides it is common knowledge that Water is coming to Africa in 2067,earliest.^^
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Declared by I can use a well. on Saturday, March 21, 2009
Suck my dick, asshole. No, wait, I don't want no AIDS from a $4 hooker. That bloated piece of crap you call 'SuperFetch' is nothing but a resource hog and generally, a shitty add-on to XP and Vista.
It's like putting your car on LPG. You'll save a lot of money (time), but at the same time you'll have to...
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Declared by Michael Fortin Has a Small Dick on Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Jihad on you's co-founder. Don't you check the e-mails?
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Will be rated DOWN!
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Declared by EagleYS on Thursday, October 28, 2010
You fuckers are playing supreme being when we can utilize the sun, wind and water as safe energy resources. You motherfuckers should dismantle all nuclear power plants worldwide and adopt this technology. Fucking idiots.
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Declared by The Dizzle on Monday, March 21, 2011
Why can't I just go out and fucking be called a man without people looking at my driver's license and being like "no ur a woman". JIHAD ON YOU
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, January 12, 2015
You fool. I hate you. I really hate you and I hate the fact that you are my best friend. Why it had to be you. It was not I but it was you to show affection and love(which I though was real). Now I realize how confused you are. And in this whole procedure you broke my heart. I hate you for what you made me...
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Declared by MantuShona on Wednesday, September 18, 2013
I am not an 80 year old.
This reminds me of increasing my fonts and line spacing in elementary to reach a 2-page minimum for essays.
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, October 7, 2007
Efi is just sitting there, all day, in the 4th floor and expects the work on the 1st floor to be doing itself. He never comes down to the people and thinks that the mobile business will just build itself while he sits there in his 4th floor corner office facing the strip club.
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Declared by Greasemonkey on Monday, October 8, 2007
A pox and curse be upon you, you great satan institution of poverty creation! May you roast in the fires of hell for destroying our lives by ruining our money! You will baste in the roasted juices of your fellow thieving bankers eternally.
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Declared by ActionMac on Monday, October 8, 2007
G.K. Chesterton is a tool! Woody Allen quotes are where it's at!
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Declared by Jonny on Monday, October 8, 2007