Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoSeriously, what the fuck. When I look at you in a bar and we make eye contact, that's a go for me. You're already on the "fuck me" bandwagon and you want to go a little faster. So when I walk over to you and say, "Hello," and you scoff, don't get all butthurt that I hit you in the face. You sent the wrong...
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Declared by Creep on Saturday, August 2, 2008
I think I love you.
Tell you? I can't.
Hold it in? I don't think I can.
"You keep me from falling apart"
I want to be in your grasp forever.
You're all I need.
I never though I could move on from the last person but then I met you and I got myself together and picked up the pieces that were shattered...
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Declared by LFSJ on Thursday, September 10, 2009
Almost 95% of the time when I try to submit a comment on this site, it takes me two or three attempts to get it to submit. What the fuck is up with this?
I like this website, but Jesus Christ, could you please stop using your Commodore 64 to process comments. It's pissing me off.
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Declared by EagleYS on Tuesday, March 2, 2010
I never asked for any form of romance. I never wanted love. There some people in this world that are'nt meant for love and I knew from the begining that I was one of them. But you convinced me otherwise and I was foolish enough to believe you. I let you raise my hopes so high and then I catch you with her!?...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Your pack of shrewd yet sadistic trolls inspires torpidity-inducing rage on an order that I have never experienced before. I am canceling my plans for the weekend and launching an online campaign to dismantle your evil empire one disgruntled serf at a time.
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, August 4, 2011
i fXcking hate how you're all so judgmental and SHALLOW! you whXres wear so much makeup that im surprised you haven't suffocated in it yet. and those clothes? yeah, if you could even call them that. just because i RESPECT myself and dont dress like a slXt doesnt mean im a freak. it means im not going to be...
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Declared by Hurt on Wednesday, February 1, 2012
יא הומו
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Declared by Dor on Monday, October 8, 2007
Just about everyone from Texas sucks (it's a fact).
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Declared by Jay on Monday, October 8, 2007
The Soldiers of Allah (anti-Gay Regiment) Hath declared this Jihad upon thee for the following attrocities: Displaying ineracial and homosexual picsations and/or images on your computer screen so that they may be viewd by those are who are not gay in so that you might poison their minds as yours is...
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Declared by Nathan on Thursday, November 1, 2007
I'm not interested in your calls. I do not pay monthly fees so you will feel free to call me and screw my mind with your offers. And please do your homework, and check if I'm married before suggesting that you talk to my wife.
The TV show I was watching when you called is way more important than your...
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Declared by Fuck all telemarketers on Friday, November 2, 2007
Stop being such a cuntface! I know you don't dig me as a boyfriend and all but do you have make me feel like a shitbag by insulting me in class every goddamn day IN ADDITION to turning me down when I asked you out? How did I even like you? Go eat a bag of dicks you fucking slut! your stomach is a water well...
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Declared by Irate and Lonely on Monday, December 3, 2007
You have some nerve mocking an American hero. Keep to the issues and stop knocking McCain for living the American dream!
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Declared by Blue on Friday, August 22, 2008
Thanks for fucking up, BITCH!!!
And thanks for the recession too....
Hope u have a nice time with ur jew buddies in hell....
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, July 26, 2009
IMMA KILL YOU WITH SCHOOL MATERIAL !
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Kudos to you BITCH for dating my ex now! Good luck trying to give better head than I do!
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, April 20, 2012
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits for delivering this devil called IPOD SHUFFLE to me in such a deteriorated state that it was possessed by all manner of devils and spells. I had to spend two hours updating software and running reset utilities in order to finally get this beast to work....
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Declared by Mullah Omar on Wednesday, October 10, 2007
We developers are declaring Jihad on you for smacking one of our number with the door.
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Declared by Steve on Friday, October 12, 2007
For emailing your ex girlfriend, going to a bar every Sunday for a month without telling me, keeping a random hook-up's number in a cell phone you got after we started dating and constantly not telling me or straight out lying about a certain smoking recreation that you have.
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Declared by a on Thursday, February 7, 2008
I really hope you die you fat lazy pig. You hurt me more than anything. Now I realize why nobody likes you. Good riddence!
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, May 31, 2009
What the fuck! I live right down the street, all of you have my number! You could have asked me! Or you could have not called me in the middle of your little get together! I would have been fine with it! Next time, don't call me in the middle of an event Im clearly not invited to!
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, February 20, 2011