Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoI am Steven Coltart, the CEO of programmer.net and owner of many unmoderated forums such as Bad Harvest and Jihad on You.
A particular employee of mine, SaraAdmin, has been continually disrespecting me. She has posted several rants about me on this site and is disobeying the ADMINISTRATIVE CODE. As such,...
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Declared by SteveAdmin on Sunday, January 20, 2013
I think I'm falling for my boyfriends best friends
I don't think I'm bored in my relationship but he's not the only person I feel like i have my eye on. He is my first real relationship and I think I might be itching to know what other relationships are like. I also have this feeling that I want to spend...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, April 24, 2018
alleen al op uw zululippen
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Declared by postcrew on Monday, October 8, 2007
For making the world a much more dangerous place to live.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 8, 2007
When your children lend good advice, don't disregard it simply because they're your children. Being older doesn't make you smarter, it just means your closer to the age where it's time to start wearing diapers once more. Jihad!!!
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Declared by Allah's disciple on Wednesday, July 16, 2008
You started with all this enthusiasm. Pointing out all the faults with our app. We declared we already knew. The app is old and was touched by many hands prior to yours. The old devs were long gone. "I will fix it!" you declared with enthusiasm. Ah but alas, now the app is riddled with your unfinished...
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Declared by Internal Developer on Wednesday, June 30, 2010
I declare a jihad on you, your dirty infidel. Die yankee scum!
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Declared by ryan on Saturday, January 15, 2011
You're an absolute ass. First you lecture me for weeks about how to act as though I were some fucking child, then you pigeonhole me into sitting around at your college for nine and a half hours because you can't be bothered to take a ten minute detour to pick me up afterwards. Enjoy the jihad, motherfucker.
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, June 28, 2011
I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I Hate Spammerz ! I...
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Declared by Javid Momeni on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
This guy's proper annoying! He's in high school but acts like a 2 year old!
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Declared by The_Truth_Speeker on Monday, October 22, 2007
VISTA IS SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT IT CANT DO ANYTHIGN RIGHT I HAVE ALMOST LOST EVERYTHING U USELESS MONEY GRABBING PIECES OF SHIT
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Jihad on me for using the word Jihad without really knowing what it means, because I'm more interested in typing my jihad gibberish than researching the origins and nuances of this word.
Oh, and recognize the legalization of ganja, mufukers. It's our birthright!
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Declared by Person on Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Yo bitch. who you fuckin around with these days. I heard yo got a new sucka on da side. yo pussy done wore out bitch. I did it. you slutty bitch ho.
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, April 23, 2010
To the stupid bitch who thinks her subject matter is the most important fucking thing in the world, who is failing me for not "understanding" how to communicate to businesses. FUCK YOU!!!! I know how to communicate, im one of the youngest students she's ever had who has successfully landed a job at corporate...
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, December 13, 2012
Congratulations the jihadists have now declared religious war on you
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, March 3, 2015
It's disgusting when the parents of autistic kids develop a martyr complex in order to be the center of attention and to be admired: "A-a-aw! Your kid is autistic! How brave and noble of you to be a martyr!" Barf! Let's face it: although autistic kids obviously can't help how they are, they can be extremely...
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Declared by anonymous on Sunday, July 19, 2015
Joe,
I am disappointed that you have not been returning my phone calls. As a direct result of your actions. I have declared a jihad on you.
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Declared by Johnny Ruhlen on Sunday, October 7, 2007
Alah akbar!
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Declared by Erlando on Monday, October 8, 2007
All hell on German Speaking Arabs! Down with them all!!
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Declared by Dudley on Monday, October 8, 2007
Så se dog for helvede at få den forbandede eksportfunktion lavet!!! Det kan sgu da ikke være så svært!!! Har I nogen idé om, hvor meget det besværer vores arbejde, at I ikke laver jeres. Nu har I lovet at lave den i syv måneder!!!! Fuck, det for meget!!!
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Declared by Sur kone on Tuesday, October 9, 2007